


Mixed Drinks and Mixed Feelings

by MaddDog



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Invasion aftermath, Lena is hella drunk, Sad Lena Luthor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-19
Updated: 2017-10-19
Packaged: 2019-01-19 12:23:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12410256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaddDog/pseuds/MaddDog
Summary: Set between the end of season 2 and the start of season 3.No one would expect to find Lena Luthor in some dive bar in all her CEO grandeur chugging an Irish Car Bomb, but that is exactly how Alex found her.





	Mixed Drinks and Mixed Feelings

**Author's Note:**

> I can't get over how messed up Lena should be after all the shit that went down in Season 2 so this is my in-between fic to give a bit of insight into how Miss Luthor is coping, *hint* ITS NOT GOOD
> 
> And I wanted to try and give her more friends.
> 
> It's a little bit all over the place but it's drunk Lena, her emotions know no bounds.

Lena Luthor was drunk.

She didn’t drink heavily often, a glass of room temperature scotch to take the edge off of work or a conversation with Lillian on occasion, but nothing more. She was a genius after all, she didn’t like when her brain got fuzzy, her thoughts incoherent. 

But there were times, like tonight, where Lena simply didn’t care. CEO, billionaire, genius, prodigy, Luthor, whatever. The week had been rough, and after a board meeting full of old, white men yelling at her, she just wanted to feel numb. Two glasses of scotch at her office and four shots of tequila at perhaps one of the seediest bars she’d ever found herself in, seemed to do the job well. It didn’t take much, it’s not like she had remembered to eat dinner. 

And now she sat alone, the seats beside her empty, picking at a couple peanuts spilled from the glass bowl on the bar. She wasn’t going to eat them, they were obviously crawling with other people’s germs, everyone passing by dipping their grubby hands in to pull out a small snack. But they kept Lena’s hands busy, she flicked one of the nuts towards her collection of shot glasses and watched it ricochet back to her. 

“Can I get anything else for you?”

Lena had been sitting at the bar for over an hour, the bartender checking on her periodically. He either didn’t know who she was, or didn’t care, and she liked that. She placed her elbows on the edge of the bar, leaning forward. “How about an Irish Car Bomb?” It only seemed fitting, she was Irish and she wanted to kill a few brain cells. 

“Ah, a woman after my heart. I’ll do one with you.” The bartender pulled down a bottle of Jameson and Bailey’s, grabbing two shot glasses. 

Bailey’s was an Irish cream, Lena realized as it was poured into the shot glasses first. And she was a vegan. A smirk played up on her lips as it hit her that she would be ingesting an animal product for the first time in like, eight years. She could change her order and just not drink it, but she was going to, she didn’t give a fuck. 

A pint of Guinness was slid Lena’s way, the bartender actually walking over to her to set the stacked shot of Bailey’s and Jameson in front of her. “We gotta let the beer settle first and then we go, okay Top Knot?”

He had been calling Lena ‘Top Knot’ since the second tequila shot. She wasn’t normally into nicknames, but one after her hairstyle as opposed to her family name was not the worst thing that could happen. A minute or so later, the beers had settled, the cloudiness gone leaving the beverage a rich, dark brown. “You ready?” Lena challenged, raising an eyebrow. 

Bartender picked up both of his glasses. “Cheers.”

Simultaneously, they dropped their shots into the beer. Lena tipped hers back, fully intending on drinking the entire thing in one go. She struggled with the last bit, the shot glass sliding up and hitting her face, but she finished and plunked the glass down triumphantly.

"Jesus Christ Lena."

Lena spun around in her stool, ready to make a snarky comment to whoever it was and found herself face to face with Alex Danvers. "Agent Danvers," she greeted coolly, a less cool hiccup following. 

Alex shook her head and took a seat at the stool next to her and motioned for the bartender. “Whiskey, neat please.” She focused back on Lena. “I didn’t peg you as being a regular customer at this kind of place.”

Lena traced the edge of her glass and let her head loll towards Alex. “I’m not. I’m more of a drink alone in my office type. But I didn’t want to be there anymore.” That might have been more information than she would usually share, but alcohol made her loose-lipped and it was her best friend’s sister. Well, hopefully still her best friend’s sister. Kara hadn’t been around as much in the past few months. It made sense, Lena having poisoned the atmosphere for her boyfriend. They still had lunch or the even scarcer, brunch. However, most of their interactions had been simple assignments for Kara, getting quotes from Lena per Catco request. Kara was still cordial, sweet, bringing donuts occasionally, but it wasn’t the same. Yet another reason for her drinking.

“Lena!”

Alex had apparently been trying to get her attention. “What?”

“I asked if you wanted to go sit in a booth with me.” Alex had her drink in hand and was standing up. 

“Why?”

Alex took a gulp from her drink and ran a hand through her cropped hair. “So neither of us has to drink alone, so the bartender will stop looking directly down your shirt…”

Lena looked down at her powder blue blouse, one more button undone than usual. “More boobs, more problems.”

This earned a chuckle from Alex. “Is that a yes?”

“Okay.” Lena slid from her stool, landing on wobbly stilettos, grabbing onto the Alex’s arm to steady herself. 

“Maybe you want a water,” Alex suggested. 

“Maybe I don’t.” Lena turned to the bartender. “I want what she has.”

When Lena had her drink, Alex led them to an empty booth. She was still holding onto her arm, hard liquor and high heels never mixed well. She was drunk but she wasn’t stupid. 

“So, how are you?”

Alex’s question was timid, as if she hadn’t fully thought through what she would actually talk about when one-on-one with Lena. The last time Lena had seen Alex had been in the aftermath of the Daxamite invasion and it hadn’t been much of a conversation. Alex was rightly more concerned about Kara’s well being and she apparently had gotten engaged? Either way, all Lena had been there for was to explain the parameters of the device she set off, how it worked and the what the exact levels of lead were in the atmosphere now. She had to do it because Lillian didn’t know how the fuck it worked, she just took the media credit. But that was it. Since then, it had been radio silence for Lena. She had thrown herself back into work, keeping L-Corp afloat and leading any initiative she could to help rebuild the city. The city that had nearly been destroyed because of her. “I’m fine,” she finally said.

Fine. Fine was such a stupid word. Not one person who ever described themselves as ‘fine’ was actually doing okay in the grand scheme of things. Lena had been manipulated once more, by a mother-figure turned psycho alien queen trying to take over the world. Her brain was exploited, she was kidnapped, and was almost married due to the fact that it was either that, or a hospital full of sick children would all die. She made a device that killed Daxamites, some of them escaped, but the ones that didn’t, that blood was on her hands. Not to mention anyone human that was hurt or killed during the invasion. She was not fine. Her emotions betrayed her and she could feel tears burning behind her eyes. Breaking her gaze from Alex to her drink, she picked up her glass and downed it. A silence fell between the two of them before Lena decided to speak again, picking the only common topic she knew they had. “How’s Kara?”

This seemed to surprise Alex, a sigh escaping her lips. “I was hoping you could tell me. I don’t see too much of her these days.”

“Me either.” Lena suddenly wished she hadn’t finished her drink so quickly, now all she had was an empty glass. “I mean, I see her, but we don’t really talk. Not that I blame her at all. Everything is my fault. Rhea bringing the invasion, my fault. Kara’s alien boyfriend dying, my fault.”

“He’s not dead,” Alex cut in.

“What?”

“Mon-El, Kara’s… he’s not on Earth anymore, but he’s not dead.”

“And somehow, that doesn’t make me feel any better.” 

“I thought you were fine.” Alex took another sip of her drink, cocking an eyebrow. 

Lena wanted to challenge her back, give a sharp tongued response, but she couldn’t. It was almost as if she could physically feel the previous drinks hitting her. Her head was heavy and she pushed her fingertips against her eyelids. “I am fine,” she repeated. “I’m a Luthor, I’m fine.”

“Who are you trying to convince, me or you?”

“Mostly me,” Lena admitted without thinking. God, she was drunk. 

Alex reached across the table, placing a hand on Lena’s arm. “It’s okay if you’re not fine. I don’t know what all you went through, but for what it’s worth from me at least, I don’t blame you. And Kara,” she paused, “you know that Kara doesn’t blame you either.” 

Lena bit down on her lip. She didn’t want Alex’s pity. She may have been having an alcohol-soaked pity party for herself and she knew Alex was only trying to make her feel better, but she didn’t need it and she sure as hell didn’t deserve it. She didn’t know what about Alex’s statement made her so angry but she suddenly felt inexplicably mad. She needed another drink and needed out of the building. Without giving an explanation, she stood up and went back up to the bar. Her coat was still laying on her previous seat and she grabbed it, pulling her wallet out of her pocket. All she had were hundreds and she slapped two on the bartop, catching the skeezy bartender’s attention. “Vodka,” was all she said, waiting the few seconds before the clear shot was placed in front of her. She threw it back, sliding the bills towards the bartender. Wobbling on her heels, she put on her coat and was out the door, ditching Alex. 

The cool night air was sobering, she certainly wasn’t sober but she felt like she could breathe. Lena let out a breath she hadn’t known she was holding. Her next intake of air was shaky, breath getting caught in her throat. She was crying. Fuck. Holding her palms under her eyes, she blinked rapidly, trying to get her mascara to go on her hands instead of running down her face. 

“Hey,” A voice called from behind her. It was Alex and her voice was curt. 

“What?” Lena kept her back turned, tone equally as cold, trying to hide the tears from her voice. 

“Why did you just walk out? What did I do?”

“Nothing, I just think I need to be alone.” Lena’s voice was betraying her, cracking. 

“Lena.” Alex softened. “You can keep this badass facade up all you want, but it’s not going to make you feel better. Believe me, I’ve been here, I’ve done the whole ‘drink to forget’. And you may not be my friend, but you’re Kara’s best friend, whether she’s acting like it right now or not. You do a pretty good job at hiding, you’ve got your CEO boss bitch demeanor down. I’m sure you’ve got most people fooled, but when I walked in there and saw you at that bar, I saw brilliance wasting away on someone who is too stubborn to feel their feelings. And I’m not going to sit here and watch you deal with your shit like this without saying something. People care about you.”

Lena whipped around. “Who? Please enlighten me on the long list of people that give a damn about what happens to me.”

“I…”

A sob forced its way out before Lena could stop it. “You can’t tell me who because there isn’t anyone.” She tried taking a step but fell into the light post next to her instead, sliding slowly down to the pavement. “So excuse me if I want to drink and forget about everything for one fucking night!”

“Lena…”

Alex squatted down in front of her, face etched with concern and Lena couldn’t stay mad. She wasn’t even sure why she was so mad to begin with. She was just sad. “I’m sorry,” she murmured, feeling impossibly small. Her vision blurred with more tears, Alex’s face going out of focus and a shiver running through her body.

Alex rubbed up and down the side of her arms. “It’s okay.”

Lena put her head down on her knees, she hated that she was crying and she hated the fact that her head had started spinning. “I just want to do something right…” she mumbled, not sure if she said it loud enough for Alex to even hear. There was no verbal response, just a tugging at her arms. “What are you doing?”

“I’m helping you stand up so I can give you a hug, that cool?”

Lena wasn’t much help, but she let Alex pull her back up to her feet and into her arms. It was a good hug, a tight hug, one that made you feel safe. Lena squeezed back, to her own surprise. 

Alex pulled back after a few moments, keeping a steadying hand on Lena. “Do you want me to call you a cab?”

“Are you going home?” Lena sniffed, running a hand over her probably super messed up face. 

“I have a beautiful fiance waiting for me, so yes.” Alex looked like she was thinking for a minute, twisting a piece of her short hair with her finger. “Do you want to come too? My place is a couple blocks away and you can sober up a little.”

“Yes, I’m very drunk right now,” Lena said, simply stating the only thing she was feeling. The tears had disappeared as fast as they had come. 

Alex seemed amused at the sudden shift in demeanor. “How much had you drank prior to me finding you?”

“Don’ know.” Lena squeezed her eyes shut. “A lot,” she decided. 

Throwing an arm completely around Lena, Alex started leading them down the sidewalk. “Let’s go get some water and carbs in you.”

In the few short blocks to Alex’s building, Lena had taken off her heels, (leaving herself barefoot,) and had pulled her hair from its updo. Alex was carrying the majority of Lena’s weight as her legs had decided they didn’t really want to work. By the time they were in the elevator, Alex propped her up against the wall to give herself a break. “How much further?” Lena asked with a groan, trying to shield her eyes from the elevator fluorescents. 

The elevator dinged, the doors sliding open. “Almost there, let’s go.” Alex dragged Lena off the wall and across the hall to her place. She struggled to get the door open and just about fell through the doorway with Lena in tow when she finally managed to unlock it. 

“What the?”

“Hey, Mags. I, uh, found this one at the bar,” Alex explained, shutting the door. 

Lena dropped her shoes and stumbled into the living space. “Hey, you arrested me.”

**Author's Note:**

> Reviews are always greatly appreciated!!
> 
> Feel free to come yell at me on tumblr, itsmaddienotmaddy


End file.
